If a galaxy falls in the forest....

String theory is still in there swinging away for respectability, although there are some cosmologists who say that the theory is "so bad that it's not even wrong.''

The theory, as I understand it (and basically I don't, but who in the name of Stephan Hawking does) is an attempt to unify the theory of gravity and the working of quantum mechanics into one big Theory of Everything, by claiming that tiny tiny particles are string like and exist in more dimensions than we've got. (It's a math thing.)

But, according to an MSNBC.com story, some scientists are suggesting the existence of galaxy-long "superstrings'' of vibrating stuff that causes gravity waves that keep us all from floating away and falling apart. And, get this, a few of these vibrations may actually be audible, sort of like the last note in the Beatles' "Day in the Life.''

I have enough trouble with gravity these days, body parts sagging, heading south like the arctic glaciers, not to mention trying to cross an icy driveway in January. The last thing I need is to hear gravity snickering at me when I pass by.